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Nov. 19th, 2014 02:07 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
pebblerockerI'm trying to write a story containing a heterosexual romance which subverts all the stuff I can't stand about heterosexual romances, and I have just come to the realisation that turning something on its head too many times can result in the damn thing being up the same way it started.
In attempting to correct for "the man always makes the moves" AND "lol, what's consent" in mainstream romances, I've ended up in a situation where although the woman has expressed her interest, it's now entirely up to the man whether this goes anywhere and if so at what pace, and the woman's desires are not really relevant to the situation. While this is an improvement over bodice-rippers, it is not the story I intended to tell.
Maybe I shouldn't also have tried to subvert "the man always has more sexual experience" in the same story. This is why same-sex couples often seem the simpler option...
In attempting to correct for "the man always makes the moves" AND "lol, what's consent" in mainstream romances, I've ended up in a situation where although the woman has expressed her interest, it's now entirely up to the man whether this goes anywhere and if so at what pace, and the woman's desires are not really relevant to the situation. While this is an improvement over bodice-rippers, it is not the story I intended to tell.
Maybe I shouldn't also have tried to subvert "the man always has more sexual experience" in the same story. This is why same-sex couples often seem the simpler option...
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Date: 2014-11-19 02:58 am (UTC)Haha, I have run into this problem, myself! "I hate Sexist Trope A! If I switch roles here and subvert this and pull the unexpected there, I'll have finally... oh, just kidding. Now I have Sexist Trope B!"
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Date: 2014-11-19 03:23 am (UTC)